Saturday, February 23, 2019

Those 'millenials' and 'post millenials' you complain about.....

I'm back in Mankato again for my son's track meet. It's conference weekend and that always brings a different kind of energy...there's something so magical about the excitement that builds and then erupts as athletes beat their personal bests, win their heat to advance or even break long standing records in their event. I have two sons in Mankato, one who recently graduated in December and is now coaching at the school and will begin grad school in the fall and one who is still an student athlete competing in the triple jump.  A fun bonus to this weekend is that my youngest son came into town with his girlfriend for the weekend as well.  My cousin's son, who is like an extra son to us is also along and it's always a fun time when they guys are together. The only thing missing is having my daughter and her boyfriend here. I love spending time with my kids. I love that they humor me with pictures, let me hug them as tight as I need to and still tease me.

Yesterday I sat at the track from 12-6:30 watching the meet. My son has some hip issues, quite possibly from 7 years of triple jumping under his belt, so he only took one jump in the long jump and then the decision was made to rest so that he can triple jump today. Some might think I'm crazy to have sat for that long watching young people I don't know, but the reality is this is my 5th year of sitting in the stands and cheering for NSIC athletes I don't really know...watching them improve and also grow older....just as my own.  And in all actuality, as I looked around, there were young people that I do know. And many who come and sit with me for a minute to say hi, get a hug and catch up.  Some are still competing and some have graduated.
And what struck me about that is how happy it makes me that I have been an adult in their life that they want to come and greet. That they hopefully see as someone on their side and who they can count on for encouragement and honesty.  An adult who is for them.

In the midst of the past couple of days I've also had contact via social media with 2 younger people I knew as teenagers and now as adults stay in touch with from time to time. And again, I am so happy to continue to have the privilege of being invited into their life. It's heartwarming to have them reach out from time to time or share something exciting that's happening in their life. 

My husband as well, has recently been given big compliments, the kind that bring tears to your eyes, from young people who love Yoda (his nickname) and thanked him for being in their corner and for the words of wisdom that he's given them over the years.

And as I mused over the hugs and laughs and advice, I wondered how many of us, and of course at times myself, have missed the chance to stay connected, to see the young people around us.  Do we stop seeing these 19+ young adults who still might need us? Do we think they've gotten too old to need us? 

Not everyone has older adults who are there. Not everyone has older adults who have instilled wisdom and knew how to love. Not everyone has older adults who continue to guide them and help them navigate young adulthood.  These transition years can often be very lonely and difficult as they try to do things on their own but yet still need support.

I'm not talking about financially supporting, taking over, or making decisions for them. I'm not talking about judging their choices, trying to change or laughing at them.  But honestly seeking to understand. Rejoicing in their accomplishments. Offering advice when asked for. And sharing your own stories of mistakes.

And sometimes just giving a hug, a word of encouragement or a wave to acknowledge that you see them.

I've often said that my favorite two age groups are those 4-7 year olds and 18-25 year olds.  And when I think about the 18-25 year olds that I know, who I continue to root for and see trying to figure it out...it motivates me to continue to see them. And to continue to let them know that I see them.

If this age group frustrates you, or if you've fallen into believing the negative viewpoint that is often shared about them, I challenge you to take the time to actually see them. 

It will be worth it. I promise you.

That's what I got today.


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